Tag Archives: soul

A BEAUTIFUL DASH

2001

In Methuen, Massachusetts a young woman is trying to prepare for a very early death.  It’s not her fault; she’s done nothing wrong in her nearly 27 years.  Indeed, from the very first she has been a bright, delightful person, quick to learn, quick to love pretty much everybody.

Inside her genes, however, something is not the same as most people’s.  She can’t fight off dysfunctional cell growth.  Her first cancer arrived when she was about 6, it’s not completely certain when, but she had been complaining of “back pain” for months before her mom finally got her to a “pediatric gastroenterologist” whose connections at Tufts Floating Hospital for Children found and diagnosed neuroblastoma.  There can be no worse day for a mother, unless it’s the one approaching inexorably, almost exactly 20 years afterwards.

That’s a short dash, 27 years.  In between those dates were 5 big battles with cancer, excellence in school, swim team, graduation from High School, excellence in college that included trips to New Orleans to help repair Katrina-damaged homes, trips to England and Ireland, visit to Paris through the Chunnel, Graduation from Wheelock College, Masters degree through Merrimack College, friends’ weddings, even one she coordinated, a trip to Peru and Machu Picchu only to run headlong into the fifth cancer struggle, now stretching into the last.  Loving teaching, early childhood and special needs, was not enough.  There never will be the full-time teaching position of which she dreamed.

How does one prepare for death?  I don’t know.  My good friend, Tony Fusco, prepared for his when an undiagnosed tumor in his brain stem proved inoperable, impossible to biopsy and ultimately fatal.  I got to sit with him the last Sunday afternoon before he re-entered the hospital to try some other treatments multiple neurologists had only the faintest idea might help.  I’d brought some nice scotch thinking we might enjoy a sip together but his gag reflex was so impaired he dared to sip only water.  It was a good afternoon and I expected he’d be home again.

When the only option of a feeding tube was offered, Tony realized – decided – that it was a tube too far: no further treatments, thank you.  His world shrank to a room at a beautiful hospice facility that was always busy with visitors and family.  He had a huge heart; it took a couple of weeks for it to go to sleep.

Clearly he’d prepared for the end.  He was 71.  At his funeral I told him that I knew where to hide a flask for when I’d join him on a porch where he now lived, where we could enjoy a sip and analyze the world situation.  He was a year younger than me.

How does one prepare at age twenty-six and three-quarters? Without an abiding religious faith it is hard to imagine.  She believes in God, but hasn’t had a lot of religious education.  I try to explain, but it is uncomfortable, certainly it was a year ago when the lung cancer appeared.  It represented a third kind of cancer, and her tiny body could tolerate no chemotherapy.  They operated and radiated, but the treatment was still a variation of repair and destroy with the overarching hope that the cancerous cells might be killed before the patient, herself.  Her breathing hasn’t been very good – or comfortable – since then.  Within a couple of months lesions were found in multiple places: brain, bones, pancreas and more.  Now at Dana Farber, they’ve radiated as many places as possible and she’s been taking an oral chemo pill with side effects.  It tended to slow down the growth, but never stopped it and now isn’t slowing it much, either.

There’s only one door open to her… to a place where the weaknesses of her body will no longer be a problem – a place where her health will become perfect.  One needs a reason to hope in order to contemplate passing through that door, alone.  Observers might say that she has no choice so “…she just has to deal with it.”

What does that mean: deal with it?  If one has any trust in God it should be clear that trying to pass through when angry and bitter is probably not the right approach.  One school of thought is that when you pass you’ll find exactly what you believed you’d find.  If that is a fade-to-black scenario, and hopeless, then that is what it will appear to be.  I believe that there is an eventual judgment, an audit if you will, of how well your tests were passed – tests you knew were coming when you agreed to accept the lifetime just ending.  Your “you” or your soul, may or may not have aced everything.  The life just ended may or may not be the last one you need to make your ascension, but Redemption is the unfailing lesson of the Bible.  It doesn’t make sense that in the matter of life and death itself, that the opportunity to redeem oneself would be absent.

For the soul, the agreement to accept a new life that includes the needed tests, is the greatest act of love expressable.

Another path of spiritual guidance says that not only are we responsible for our un-passed tests, or “karma,” but also for our reason for being, our “dharma.”  Both are part of judgment.  The more aware we are while on this side of that door, the more likely we are to meet and exceed the reasons for this life.  Life is not a knife-edge: Hell on one side and the gift of Heaven on the other; it is a path made broad by our free will.  The choices we make have meaning.

When someone passes very young, there has been little time to make bad choices, which is to say, few sins have been committed.  At the same time, few opportunities have presented for passing tests.  Maybe a life that ends in youth is lived sacrificially so that those around you can pass their tests.  Living that life is your test: a unique expression of love.

From the limited, somewhat fuzzy understandings of a human lifetime, this is my most comforting perception of the young lady’s life: one of sacrifice.  Neither I nor anyone else on this side of the door is privy to the purposes of the lives of others, and barely able to grasp the meanings of our own.  Still, this observer has recorded no imperfections in our young patient’s life. 

Is she comforted thereby?  Does she perceive the success of her life?  Or does she feel she’s been punished or singled out for “bad luck?”  I try to tell her to not fall into those ideas, but to approach the door with an open heart and mind, accepting of the possibilities of immense love on the other side.

Something she has earned.

LOVE OF WISDOM

It is our obligation to understand what things mean.

Life is a philosophy, as is death, one could surmise.  Another philosophical thread might be spun from the question of whether death and life are opposite one another.  The observer of, say, a live frog and a dead one can readily note the obvious differences, most specifically that the live one is capable of independent action while the one considered dead, obviously is not… but, are the two states opposite one another?  Given that death is the natural end of the limited period called life, it ought not be seen as the opposite of life.

Let’s jump up a level in our contemplations.  Philosophy implies belief and wouldn’t exist without it.  Truth being immutable and untethered to belief, the death of, say a frog, leaving a dead, stiff carcass, is subject to only one belief: the formerly live frog has ceased the stage we call “life” and now exists in a state we call “death.”  There isn’t any room for conflicting descriptions of the change of condition or, for the rational, conflicting meanings  of the change, as well.  Humans, however, are immersed in a sea of philosophies and, in the presence of a large smattering of scientific knowledge, our philosophies are concentrated upon – if not entirely concerned with – life and death… of humans.  We believe humans are unique for whatever reasons and philosophy enables our explaining those beliefs.

One might distill that fact into simpler terms: philosophies are based on how  to create life,  how  to live and on how  to die.  Too simple?  Let’s consider a few.  The most widely known are religious, the fire that has forged most of our beliefs:  marriage, rearing of offspring, educating them and launching them into marriage, conducting our personal lives, dealing with crime and anger and unfairness and injustice, meeting our obligations to others, and being honest and honorable and fulfilling our duties… and how to worship our creator and perhaps other gods.  Every religious belief structure includes dietary and sexual laws, ways to punish and ways to exact revenge, as it were… or avoid it.  Structures of belief.

There are philosophers who explain the meanings of our beliefs, of our lives, our emotions and our hatreds.  They try to explain why religions are complete or incomplete, why life has meaning or it doesn’t; they rationalize failure, success, happiness and depression, loneliness, gregariousness, hygiene and filth.  Philosophers have, and will again, endeavor to explain industry, work, laziness and entertainment… even complete nihilism and the need for suicide.  In a way, they are all explanations or understandings (opinions) about creating, living and ending life… of humans, mainly.

Humans build things.  There’s a philosophy about this need to construct more than is necessary for basic shelter and safety.  Humans invent ways to grow more than enough food – then we eat it all.  There are philosophers trying to explain why we eat more than we need, even if it hurts us.  The same is true about alcohol, drugs, tobacco, coffee and chocolate.  Why are these things so important to humans?  How is it that we can abuse one another and even children?  People try to think about and reason about, explain and understand these odd behaviors.  What do they mean?

Much of religious thought / philosophy is about the end of life and the existence or absence of a soul living in the spiritual self of every human.  The majority of humans alive today believe to some degree that there are rewards or punishments awaiting them after death.  It feels Prudent to consider those possibilities.  If we live a rotten life do we, should we, “get into” heaven the same as the most charitable and saintly people we know?  Do non-religious people have a last minute choice to win or possibly earn a ticket to heavenly realms?  How good a life must one live to be acceptable to get even a decent room in the many mansions of heaven?

Do we have to leave earth, or just life, to get to heaven?  What if you aren’t good enough to take up residence in heaven?  Do you remain stuck on earth somehow?  Or are you wiped from creation, every record and memory, any act of love or anger toward others that you created while alive – just ‘poof’?  Gone?  The people who run heaven wash their hands of you?  Maybe you are parked in a halfway village – or a one-third way or one-quarter way – until there is either a lull in new applications or one of the staff in heaven thinks you can be rehabilitated.  These are philosophical questions because each is laden with meaning.  For some.

It is possible to drift through, or fight through life without ever thinking of what your actions mean.  Philosophically this seems like a sad outcome for years of living, and implies a certain sociopathy: complete disregard for others, something that has to be learned; no one is born that way.  Some people, unfortunately, learn a rare but real philosophy of hatred or disregard for others, even in their families.  These are they who have a high likelihood of incarceration and other interactions with government agencies.  Those interactions, whether with social workers, foster care or special schools, fulfill the philosophies of others.

That is, a large fraction of society believe in government as a better source of decision-making than any family unit or parent.  We can see a constant push from these types to remove children from parental influence at ever earlier ages.  It reflects the philosophies of socialism which are also anti-religious.  At the same time, there are smaller societies where communal child-raising has worked beautifully for centuries, only thanks to a culture supported by shared philosophies toward rights, wrongs and the stages of life.  These beliefs are too rare in complex industrialized “societies” like ours.  Here and there small “communes,” often religion-based, attempt to maintain cleaner and simpler cultures and child-raising is shared somewhat.

This can practically, and honestly, be done in the United States in only small, restrictive communities, because ever growing fractions of our “multicultural” nation do their best to be as different from our actual heritage and mores as possible.  Parents relinquish control of their children for more than brief periods at great risk.  Their teachers, counselors and coaches are increasingly likely to believe very different things about what children should believe , learn, memorize or think of the world, than what their parents believe.  Those whose philosophy includes greater trust in government(s) than in individuals will tend to separate children intellectually – philosophically – from their parents.  These are the ones whose guiding philosophy is that we cannot enjoy a true society until we all accept the “common good” ideals of socialism, and reject all the old ideas and ideals, including that pesky freedom we try to enjoy and pass on to our kids.  Religions are an impediment for this type… unless the beliefs they espouse are destructive of the awful principles that formed the United States.

Try to find out the philosophies of your children’s teachers.  If they don’t believe what you believe, why let them screw up your kids?  Because the government says to?

There are a lot of money-related philosophies, too.  Some of these – most of them, actually, are destructive of the lives of ordinary people: the kind that go to work and try to provide for their families and save for retirement.  Most of the people who form the backbone of free-enterprise capitalism don’t have money philosophies.  Money is simply a tool for negotiating life… which could be a philosophy, but isn’t worth the time.  For the ultra-capitalists, worldwide bankers, central bankers, money isn’t money, it’s their lower-than-secular God.  They worship the stuff.

Money is not the “root of all evil,” it is the love of money that has that effect.  Those international, ultra-wealthy, celebrity and relatively hidden titans of finance, are among the most evil, amoral humans on the planet.  The small-business entrepreneur who winds up wealthy is the example to emulate; the financial wizard who earns through speculation and trading and who controls multiple fortunes internationally, is not.  While both may cause envy, you will have to forego your moral bases and patriotism to emulate the latter.  Prudence is skeptical of entrepreneurs who become extremely wealthy because they are smart, but then decide that they are also wise.  These same then try to sway governments or major institutions to follow the wealthy person’s philosophy on how life should be lived.  The wisdom of history and heritage, they often deal with as impediments to the “better” or more efficient ways of life, education and freedom from which the oligarch is far removed and insulated by wealth.

There are philosophies of money and wealth that derive from the love of money.  They are perceived as entitled control of others, and are divorced from the beautiful chaos of freedom.

Philosophies about human differences are key to civilization.  Rarely do philosophies derived from ignorance of “others” include automatic trust or love.  A philosophy of tolerance will erode natural distrust and lead to acceptance and then love and trust.  One’s philosophy must include belief in a path toward acceptance – the alternative is mental barriers that devolve into hatred.  Either philosophy must be taught to offspring.

Can we make laws that require belief in eventual acceptance?  No, not successfully.  But we can, by trusting citizens self-governed by largely shared philosophies, create a legal structure where acceptance is possible.  Our Constitution is the best example of this structure.  “e pluribus unum” is the clearest statement of the philosophy of acceptance: “from many, one (people or nation).”  Recent failings of American constitutionalism have resulted from the intrusion of alternative philosophies  into the fabric of liberty and responsibility, and from the denial of other philosophies, primarily religious.

We must remain vigilant.

Each of us will pass on, but not, Prudence’ philosophy says, like the stiff and lifeless frog.  We have an obligation – one we accepted – to leave this plane of existence having lived, loved and served for the benefit of others and thus for the benefit of ourselves.  A wise and Prudent soul once observed that “…you get to keep only what you give away.”  Only our acts, loves, angers, hatreds go on with us to be judged.  That’s a Prudent philosophy.  The United States of America provides unmatched opportunities to live in ways of which we might be proud.

The Religious Question

Everyone seems to question religious doctrine these days… “everyone” meaning a large majority of Christians in Europe and the United States and Canada.  We think we have become “too smart” to believe that stuff.  That smartness is like an infection, similar to socialism, where our science, technology and ubiquitous governors (bureaucrats) are creating a much nicer world than “God” supposedly ever did.  The internet, gaming and pornography are meeting most of our needs; WalMart, Kohls and fast-food restaurants handle the rest.

And the rigors of marriage are so last Millennium – let the bureaucrats raise the kids.  I, mean, with pre-kindergarten, pre-school, K–12 and perpetual college, who really needs parents anymore?  The love-making part is OK, but even that’s becoming a big hassle; and courtship… forget it.  Hooking up and living together is fun but look at all the divorces.  No, that model doesn’t really work for us anymore.  If that’s the religious model, then let’s pass.  And it’s so expensive!  How much more pleasant driving around is.  Besides, my low-emissions hybrid helps to save the planet.

Oddly enough, Muslims are more serious about religion today than almost ever.  And the most serious expression of their most-serious religion is the destruction of Christianity – and of Christians, themselves, of course.  It’s as if we were in a race with terrorists to prove the unimportance of Christianity, except we’re not winning.  Muslims still want to kill us or convert us.  Jews are just as bad as Christians, in their book, so they are more than happy to kill them, too.  Jews are certainly willing to give up religious seriousness, along with Christians, so why do the Muslims care so much?  It’s a worthy question.

As Muslim terrorism has accelerated over the past 50 years there has been a parallel, mostly anti-Christian movement gaining steam in “the West:” atheism.   And this isn’t some “live and let live” form of God-less non-religion.  No.  It has become virulent… same infection, different strain.  Atheist don’t expend a lot of effort opposing Judaism, Buddhism or Hinduism – mostly they target Christianity.  Christmas makes atheists apoplectic, similar to its effect on Muslims.  Why on Earth do self-proclaimed non-believers – we’re talking scarlet-lettered “A” atheists, here, not agnostics or, presumably, not ignorant fools, but serious opponents of Christianity and its slightest mention… why the Hell do they care?

The broad network of atheists concentrate on the awful record of human organizations that operate in the name of doctrines other humans wrote stories about, derived dogma from, and implemented with motivations of personal and institutional power, as well as motivations of financial security.  There are thousands of years of policies and incidents – crimes, in fact – that belie the ostensible teachings of EVERY religious tradition.  Just collating and describing every human error will always yield plenty of material.  Indeed, an entire movement could be, has been, created out of the effort.  But that story is not complete, is it?

Nowhere in the vast network of atheist websites and their aggregation of terrible acts, is there a long list of extraordinary acts of charity by other humans deeply motivated by the overarching story of Christian sacrifice.

If your intention is to catalogue human failings, you will forever be busy.  You may also become blinded to phenomenal beauty, sacrifice, love and greatness.  However, rendering judgments about the existence of “God” based solely upon the much-edited and selected stories in the Old and New Testaments of the Bible, or upon the evolving catechisms of churches, will always be somewhat erroneous.

There are but two places to stand in the debate about the truth of God’s existence: He exists or He doesn’t.  The rest of arguments on either side are inevitably biased for each advocate’s personal advantage, comfort, satisfaction or smug superiority.  Barring personal experience with God, Himself, all of our words are opinion, more or less informed.  Hearsay, we might conclude.  And, in Prudence’ view, too fraught with mysteries that may be balanced only with faith.  This in no way denigrates faith.  Faith is the best glue religion provides to cause populations to share codes of morals and conduct.

Prudence tells us that God would not launch our long climb into perfection with a list of mysteries.  It doesn’t make sense that He would hold us to standards we cannot understand – there must be a logical structure to God’s Law, logic that humans can grasp and apply to our social organization.  Further, it seems reasonable to assume, following God’s Law must be good for people and for Life, itself, and, still further, and logically, for God, himself who never, by definition, acts outside of his own “Law,” since He is that Law.

So, for those of us who stand on the side of God’s reality, admittedly thanks to a measure of faith, there must be a value to God for the creation and existence of humans with the free will to choose between His law and earthly evil.  That is, there must be a BENEFIT to God to go to the trouble of creating humans.

Hinduism provides some insight to the logic of God’s existence, through the laws of Karma.  There is a near-universal understanding of what Christianity states as: “As ye sow, so shall ye reap,” which is to say: “…so MUST ye reap.”  Karma is more complex than that, of course, because of its connection to re-embodiment of the soul.  Western Christianity does its best to suppress the possibility of being truly “born again,” but even the Bible includes references to it.  In one view, the New Testament provides the opportunity to return, through karma, to resume self-perfection, arriving after being “judged and found wanting,” agreeing to accept the rigors of a life that will provide the opportunities to “balance” what is “wanting” – karma.  Only by cleaning up all of our negative acts in whatever lifetime, can we achieve acceptance into “heaven,” if that is our goal.  Whether we call it Nirvana or Heaven, or some other, mankind generally believes in rewards in an afterlife for good living in this life.  Is there a logic to this?

There is if God also benefits.  What if – just consider – that God’s Law that tells mankind to “go forth and multiply,” applies equally to Him.  He is the Law, by definition, so of course it does.  In other words, individual perfection is logical if God is ENHANCED by humans’ choices to adhere to His Law and not succumb to the comforts of evil.  In other, other words, God becomes happier when his “children” do right.

Oh, that’s impossible, you might say.  God is all there is.  But, then, who are we to limit Him… if we are standing on His side, after all?  After all, you get to keep only what you give away!  In those other words, it is only the ACTION of charity – or of following the Law – that stays with your soul.  The other side of that is that an evil action must be balanced in order for your soul to progress into “Heaven.”  It’s very logical.

And, it’s not a mystery.  There is a value and purpose to being “good” and not “evil.”  Part of the value is that society and civilization, itself, holds together through the application of shared morals.  Society functioning, strengthening families and children, educating them and protecting them, is a value.  Only in strong societies do people have the opportunities to worship and, one hopes, to learn greater aspects of the Law.  No mystery there.

Atheists perform an important function.  They continuously expose our flaws, particularly  human failures in the guise of religion.  And well they should.  They may be blind to some things, but they’re searchlight-clear on crucial others.  If they can recognize, as Karma describes, that life is a series of tests and that earth is the testing place, then they might accept that belief in God is a test and that disbelief is also a test.  It really doesn’t serve anyone to attempt to determine whether others are passing or “failing” a test, only whether we, ourselves are passing.  If belief in God generates hatred and death, it is reasonable to think that a test is being failed.  Likewise, if disbelief generates hatred or worse, that is also evidence of a failure to pass.

Every event, whether we deem it good or bad, is an opportunity to choose good or evil.  One can stand in judgment of God if he or she wishes, and say that this or that earthquake, flood or disease is an indictment of God, but what is the value of that except to sow hatred?  If God were to place us all in nurseries so that we would be perpetually comfy and fed, free of disease – free of choices, in effect, what value would humans have?  There would be no growth, no strength, no ability to make ourselves more perfect.

If there were no standards to meet or tests to pass, life would be useless; there’d be no horizon, no mountains to climb, no wonder to fulfill by finding out.  No, you non-believers, that there are tests is not proof there is no God but, rather, that there is.

It is our response to the test that we can take with us, not our comfort.  Still, you should keep on holding up your mirror, reflecting back at us our flaws and errors in God’s name.  The original question, though, remains.  Why do opposing religions, best exemplified by Muslims in opposition to every other belief structure including atheism, become so hateful toward others?  What do they care?  I think the only care great enough is that their chosen enemies may be right.